The Shocking Reality #1: An Update

Ok ladies and gentlemen, if you are reading this, either you are just passing by or you read my latest Myspace blog and came here for an update on myself. For the time being my Myspace profile and blogs will be dedicated to everything Wrestlemania, so here is where I will talk about my life until Wrestlemania 23 has come and gone. If you are interested in my Wrestlemania blogs or just want to see what my Myspace profile looks like, then please visit myspace.com/shocksreality and you will see all that stuff, but for now lets get on to the purpose of this blog.

Ok so I have recently joined a band. It is a classical band with most members being of Portugese decent. I've had one rehearsal with them so far and I have to say that I enjoy the environment a great deal. All the people were very nice to me and didn't mind that because I've been out of practice, I sucked. I know with time I will get better, playing music is just like riding a bike. My skill on the Saxophone will return soon. I am in the band along side, My Vision partner Dan The Man, but also other friends like Joe, Mikie, and Geoff. I'm sure there are others, but I can't think of them right now. It is a very good thing for me in this stage of my life, where I'm basically uncertain of what's next. Its a good way to just have a little fun until I can figure out my next move.

The employment situation hasn't imporved yet. I am still unemployed, but am looking at a few options that are available to me. I haven't made a complete decision on where I wanna work, but I have applied to a few places just in case. I DO NOT regret my decision to walk out on Goodtimes for the second time in my life, but this time I am much more vocal in my decision. I believe that the way Goodtimes is run, is awful and I could not stand for it anymore. I was not a good employee, but a great one. I worked hard and earned my paycheck. Even working when I physically couldn't walk. I did that for them and they repaid me with shit. I should have been appreciated for all my hard work, just like so many of the other employess past and present. I was sick of it and I still believe that I was right in my decision to leave. I may not have a job right now, my finacial situation may be a little tight right now, but I walked out of that place with my head held high and my self respect intact, therefore, I feel it was the best decision. I will never look back. I have been asked to apologize for my actions and my way of leaving. I've thought about it and to be honest, I do not have the sympathy in my heart to apologize. I don't believe I was wrong like I did the last time I did this and apologizing would be giving in to what they want, which is me admitting that I was wrong. I just can't do that, it would go against what I stand for.

The thought of wrestling school has popped into my head a lot lately. I feel like the last time I was there, I didn't give my all and eventually gave up and went home. I don't believe that was truly me because I define myself as someone who is willing to do anything, take anything, and survive anything, to get to where I need to be. I need to be in a wrestling ring, entertaning fans, in my own unique way, but something happend. Maybe it was a result of two of the worst emotional years of my life, where personal problems were hefty. Maybe it was the fact that multiple injuries slowed my body down and made it almost impossible for me to do certain things. Maybe it was the fact that there were so many people within the wrestling industry trying to turn me away from the business, saying things to crush my spirt, but in the end, it doesn't matter. I am to blame for not going all the way. I am better then that. I know that inside me lies the spirt, the fire, and the desire to become one of the greatest professional wrestlers ever, but I just need to stop making excuses and get the damn thing done. I am trying very hard to find that confidence again. I need to live everyday of my life with that confidence before I am able to return to training and make a second attempt at becoming a pro wrestler.

I just want to say a few things about a certain person who is in the wrestling industry his name is Sheldon Goldberg and he is the promoter of both New England Championship Wrestling and World Women's Wrestling. Sheldon is one of the best people I've ever met. He has a wealth of knowledge on the wrestling industry and every time I have had a conversation with him, I've learned something new. He really opened up my eyes to possibly doing other things in the wrestling industry besides actually being a wrestler. My dream is to become a wrestler and make it to the WWE, but he has given me a lot of advice for other things I could do. He really knows his stuff and its been an honor to know him. NECW and Triple W are both successful independent promotions and Sheldon has a lot of great ideas along with great ideas from his crew. Last year, I was apart of their ring crew and I tried to make every show that I possibly could. Trasnportation was an issue, so I didn't make it to all of them, but the nice guys that they are, they offered to drive me to some of those shows. Sheldon has driven me places, bought me lunch, and shared so much knowledge with me, just for hanging up some posters and helping with the ring. That means a whole lot to me. I don't always agree, or understand what Sheldon and the rest of the NECW crew does, but I respect them all for what they do and can see that the fans find it very entertaining. He is a very old school guy and I guess I can be considered new school, with knowledge of the old school. I am a student of the game, but sometimes its hard to really understand the old school way because I wasn't born in that era and a lot of it isn't on tapes or dvds. WWE 24/7 on demand has been a big help in that, showing a lot of stuff from the territories. It really is great entertainement. In recent months, I've learned to take a little of Sheldon's old school and combine it with a little of my new and its really struck a creative spark in my mind. I wish I had been more of a help to those great people and Sheldon latley, but I've just been struggling with things inside. Sometimes its hard to get over personal problems, but I'm doing a lot better with them now then ever before. I hope to soon return to the ring crew and aid Sheldon with whatever else he needs from me. I need my shoulder to heal before I can seriously lift a lot of that stuff, but hopefully I can be of some help.

This weekend I will be attending band rehearsal and then possibly heading over to Goodtimes to view the pay per view boxing match between Mexican superstars Marco Antonio Barrera and Jaun Manual Marquez. I think it will be a great fight and will be the beginning of a great year for boxing. If anyone reading this is heading over to Goodtimes to watch that fight, look for me and give me a shout.

And finally in the world of comic books, which has basically invaded almost all of my life that isn't wrestling, The Initiative has begun. I am collecting my second consecutive super series, the first being Civil War. I am also collecting The Incredible Hulk and Ghost Rider among others, but that isn't as big as The Initiative is and Civil War was. This is a great time in comic books, with just about anything happening. Including the death of one of the most iconic comic book characters in history, Captain America. I was shocked when I read about it and it will go down as one of the saddest moments in comics.

Thats all I've got for now, but keep checking this page for updates on my life. Like I said Myspace will be dedicated to Wrestlemania, so if you want that stuff go there, but if you want information about what's going on with me, then come here for the time being. Thank you very much ladies and gentlemen. Shock has spoken.